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Friday, October 30, 2009

CD6
Day After Surgery: Ranting About The East Coast

The doc wasn't able to do the sclerotherapy procedure on my right ovary as they weren't able to get the medication that they use in time. Apparently, the compounding pharmacy in St. Louis that packages the medication that I needed failed to renew their NY state licensing in time and so they're out of commission for another week to week and a half. Ugh.

All it is is pure tetracycline in a sterile vial - my doc would reconstitute it with sterile saline and use this to flush out my ovary once the blood had been aspirated away.

Amazing that there seems to only be ONE pharmacy in the entire blessed country that can do this. Ya know? I bet there are other pharmacies that can do this. Really. It's got to be an east coast madness thing. More on this later.

So they weren't able to do this procedure.

Upon waking up, the doctor said that they also didn't aspirate the cyst on my left ovary as it had already popped.

So, the last RE clinic (Columbia) had essentially postponed my cycle for NOTHING. NOTHING! I could have easily cycled right away. Damn!!! I have loved the doctors there and they have a top notch embryology lab, but it's just frustrating that they have a cookie cutter approach to IVF. Even my cycle was cookie cutter, using ganirelex on me when I am nearly 45. Ugh.

So he did the hysteroscopy, the only thing he COULD do considering the circumstances. He found some flimsy sorts of adhesions in my uterus, which he removed. I had some good cramping afterward and have bee spotting since then.

Bummer that I have to do another procedure the week of November 9th because of the pharmacy. That just bites.

So I am going to be doing cycle #5 in December unless I am able to get them to cycle me out of the December cohort. I am going to beg for that. Hopefully they'll relent and let me proceed earlier, but they do close for holidays so they wouldn't be able to monitor me during Thanksgiving as no one would be there. Maybe I could at least start my stims then and monitor right after the holiday?

We'll see.

It's so hard to be patient when I have so many damned setbacks like this.

Along the surrogate route, I placed an online ad for a gestational surrogate. Three gals have written so far. Wow. I'm a bit scared to go this route, but I am seriously considering this if I wind up getting the job that I am currently interviewing for. I can't afford a surrogate without a job that pays really well as it'll cost me at least $18K for her fees and, at most, another $6K for the attorney's fees to draw up a contract. Add in her travel fees and any other expenses and it's easy to imagine that a surrogate would cost me $30K. At least.

I would love to find a local surrogate to cut down on fees but also that I would simply want to be close by while she is pregnant - but chances of that are slim as you can't pay a surrogate in the state of New York. It's illegal here. Can you f*cking believe that? I simply don't understand why it's illegal for me to literally "rent" a woman's uterus in order to have a child. Also, why shouldn't she be able to provide this service for others? It's her body for cryin' out loud. Some women love to be pregnant and are thrilled to provide this service for others. It's their right to be able to do this! I don't understand our country's laws. We're so behind. We're in such a dark age when it comes to how we deal with fertility, the LGBT community, etc.

It's not illegal in the state of NY to have a compassionate surrogate (unpaid) so I have a few family members that I will ask to see if they might help. I am not hugely close to either side of my family, so asking one of them to help is very uncomfortable for me. Also, because I have immune issues that might be hereditary in nature, a family member might also have the same issues that would cause her to have repeated implantation failure as well.

Why can't the law realize that there are very good reasons for our need for paid gestational surrogates? We need access to women who are willing to do this for us who have had children of their own, or have been surrogates before - women with a proven ability to bear children. At least California doesn't have such silly laws. Paid surrogates are fine. Having the intended parents' names on the birth certificate is fine too. Sheesh.

I am so frustrated with all things east coast today. No offense to anyone who reads this on the east coast. But even the act of buying a bottle of wine in this blessed state (NJ) means that I have to hit up a "liquor store" in addition to a grocery store when I am out shopping. Same for NY, CT, and other surrounding states. The east coast is so puritanical. Anti anything that is outside of the box. State lobbyists say that allowing liquor sales inside stores will cause mom and pop stores, and wineries(!), to go out of business. Really? I don't think so. Opening up your market to new customers would increase sales. Multi level marketing. It's marketing 101 folks.

I've stopped being mad about this one - well almost. I just order my wine from California now and have it shipped here to NJ. Screw this stupid state and the horse it road in on. My dollars are going back to California where it is SANE.

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Comments on "CD6
Day After Surgery: Ranting About The East Coast
"

 

Blogger Mad Hatter said ... (12:24 PM) : 

Sorry about the whole non-surgery surgery thing...How frustrating!!!Hmmm....Can you keep a residence of some kind (even a cheap little apartment or room somewhere) in a close state where it is legal to pay a surrogate and just have everything done there? You've probably thought of that, but just in case...

 

Blogger linda said ... (1:26 PM) : 

I've got family in CT, OH, and CA. A bit spread out. :-( I could do a surrogate in the SF Bay Area...that way I can visit my mom, too. Good idea.

 

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