Holy Crap

The long awaited call just came not two minutes ago.

My donor embryos are ready.

4 perfect 8-celled lovlies - if I want them. The product of an egg donor and the father's sperm. The embryologist said they are very high quality. Oy, visions of triplets dance through my head.

I have 7 days to digest the parent profiles and decide. If I don't choose to take these I can stay at the top of the list for the next set to come my way. I'll continue to get "first dibs" until the right set comes in.

Since the partner and I have split I'll be signing up to be a single mom, a scary prospect. I'm not sure what to do. My heart says "go for it", my brain says, "Why do you have to do this? You gave up!"

How do I make this decision this week? This month? This year?